Feeling ten years younger and its not a good thing...

One of the things we have found really frustrating is how hard it is to start life again at 30 and particularly in the states. This is a country where everything is centered around your social security number and your credit history. Both easy enough unless you choose to try to work there as an immigrant. I can only compare the frustration to one where you need a job but can't get one without having job experience but can't get the experience without first having a job. I feel like im 17 again, and I have to say, I dont like it at all.

Firstly social security numbers (SSN) are needed for everything. We naively assumed they were like IRD numbers - just needed for tax purposes - nope. We couldn't even get a cellphone plan without them. They are like an intrinsic piece of being a functioning member of society here. The hardest part of this process is that you cant apply for a social security number until you are in the country and it takes 10 days to be sent to you. 10 days where you cant buy anything that requires a credit check like a phone plan, sign a house or car lease. It even caused issues with G being entered as an employee at work, having his pre-work drug test etc as every system is based on it. The kicker is that on our work visa we are not allowed to enter the country until 10 days prior to starting work. So you arrive and literally have to spend the first ten days waiting to be able to do the things you need to do to set up your life here. We are very very fortunate that G's work has provided us with a furnished apartment and a rental car for the first 60 days so we weren't too caught out but I cant help but think of others who may can come here on a similar visa but without the support from their company.

The credit check is another hard thing when starting life again at 30. We essentially have no credit history that is recognized over here. It doesn't matter that we own a house (the value of which, with houses prices here, would buy a pretty sweet house) or that we have both had VISAS and Mastercards for over ten years. It doesnt matter what we have in the bank back home. It only takes into consideration what you have here. So we have been trying to start to build a credit history here. Ways included cellphone plans - that was out the first ten days as no SSN, leasing a car - nope need a SSN for that, credit card - yes okay but you need to load money onto it and use it more as a debit card because we have no credit history. So that's what we have had to do. Slowly starting from the ground up.

It has been a really frustrating process, every time we take two steps forward we end up being bumped back a step in the process. We have decided that we want to continue to lease an apartment in our complex after the corporate lease ends and they have a newly renovated 3 bedroom here. Nothing in Texas is small and it suits us perfectly. We have no interest in maintaining lawns etc but obviously need one for T to run around in and this is perfect. Huge grass area, couple of rugby fields big, big swimming pool, and best thing a gym on site. I can leave our apartment and go for a 40 minute run and be back in the house 43 minutes after leaving. But of course we failed the credit check because we have no credit history and G's SSN was issued after June 2011 ( why that date is important?). Sigh. Luckily we have been able to secure the house with an additional months rent as a deposit so nothing too dramatic but still meant making a simple process a lot more drawn out than it needed to be.

Another thing has been forms of ID. We need state issued ID  like a driver license to do things like lease a car (our preferred choice for our primary car here). Sweet. We have 90 days to drive on our NZ licenses before we have to have Texas ones. I have been absolutely dreading having to do a drivers test here. Not even sure I could pass one in NZ again. Then I saw the Texans drive. Need to use the off-ramp three lanes over? No worries. Wait till the last minute and then veer hard right across all three lanes at speed. The bigger the truck, the later you leave it. In fact maybe I will fail because I don't drive aggressively enough, or because I try to stick to speed limits. No consistent speed limit here, in 3 kms along the same stretch of road you can have 3 different speed limits. Not that it matters especially on the highway as it appears to only be a suggestion.The only time I see speed limits adhered to is school zones where you can only drive 20 miles per hour. Apparently the fines start at $500 so they are taken pretty seriously. Anyway 90 days to get a license. So Garth goes to sit his test in his first ten days. Nope. You have to be here 30 days before you can sit a test. Why? No reason. Its Policy. So instead of us, as immigrants and used to driving on the other side of the road, wanting to do the local testing and therefore theoretically show we are safe to drive here, we cant. We have to sit twiddling our thumbs till the magic date.

We have managed to use our passports for ID for some things. Dont worry I have been able to buy alcohol. A matter which became a bit more fun when I saw the prices ( and sizes) of alcohol here. 1.5L bottle of NZ wine for $15 no worries mate. The passport has led to a few humorous/ worrisome questions. At one pre employment check for Garth, a government employee asked Garth for ID, when he responded I have a New Zealand drivers license and passport, will that work? She looked him in the eye and responded ' I'm sorry to ask, but can you tell me if New Zealand is a state? Not a hint of sarcasm.

Im sure every country is just as bad for this kind of thing but we have found it very frustrating. We are now getting 'better' at playing the game. We expect delays when doing the 'simple' stuff. When we go to do things like sort tax numbers for me and the boys ( we don't get SSNs) we know now to take every piece of documentation we have ( a sizable folder thanks to US bureaucracy), including pieces they haven't asked for, and including printed copies of 'online ONLY - these do not need to be printed' forms from the federal database ( as we have been asked for these when applying for G SSN), we know that we all need to go to prove we exist even if the appointment is for one of us, we know to pack for a full days outing including clothes, food, toys and everything else little people require, in fact the only thing we have yet to be asked for or have needed is a vial of our blood. Im sure we will get to that though.

The things Ive found....

Things I've found hard

1. Sleeping all night.  H has adjusted no worries. T seems to alternate between great nights - once sleeping 14 hours, and terribly - waking at 2 or 3 in the morning and not going back to sleep till 6am.  Im not too tired during day as im busy but when boys go to bed, I'm just physically shattered.

2. Wishing family and friends were here especially when I see things and think oh this person would like that.

3. Writing and editing this blog on my phone.  Grrr...

4. Money - We are currently doing everything in cash. All notes look the same, sizes aren't logical and a 1 c coin ffs! My approach so far is to pay for everything with notes. Might just take the kg of coins I seem to have collected in change and bank it.

Things I've found harder than expected

1. Getting boys into the car in the heat especially as it's so hot inside the car. Its ok with G off work as he can pre-cool the car. Will have to think about how to go about getting them in, and the car as cool as possible, as fast as possible.

2. Lack of fresh air. Im not a big air con person much preferring windows open but here thats not practicable.  Trying to get out for walks and to sit by the pool when I can. The mosquitos have obviously sized me up as fresh blood ( in every sense).

3. Food shopping.  I knew everything in the supermarket would be different but I never really realized how hard that makes it, especially trying to read labels ( dreaded sugar content for t, gluten free for me) on everything.  Makes it quite the ordeal.


Things I've found easy

1. Shopping.  Already been to target. Total amaze. Only had half an hour there before we had a meeting at the bank but managed to to fill a trolley quite easily. Can not wait till I get a proper look at the shopping here. Sidenote: Walmart is way cleaner and better organised and less crazy than the Internet promised. I was both disappointed and relieved not to run into too much crazy. It also stocks some similar baby products - toys etc that ive bought for the boys before at like quarter of the price. G pointed out the the 55" samsung smart tv we paid $2500 for at home there for $700.

2. Settling into our accommodation. Bigger than expexted and sweet facilities including a gym with kids playroom, pool and beach volleyball court (or giant sandpit in t's eyes). T is loving time in the pool and again im making the most of G being off to swim kidfree.

Things I've found easier than expected

1. Finding fresh good quality salad and veges - everyone warned me about the food but we are about 5 mins drive from an organic supermarket and of course it's waaaay cheaper than nz.Tonight we had Salmon orzo salad packed full of asparagus, cherry toms, corn and black beans. Not quite the hotdogs with cheese from a tube that people kept warning me about.

2. Opening a bank account was easier than getting our last  video store account. Literally a passport was all that was needed.

3. Driving. Yep I've been driving. Even been out without G as co pilot. Its actually quite fun.  I really like our rental car. Hardest part was a left hand turn at a busy intersection.  And I pretty much have to chant ' lefty loosy, righty tighty' at every turn to remember which side to turn onto, but im sure/ hope that will get easier. Observation - seems like everyone here leases their cars/ buys new. We have literally seen less than 5 cars older than 2 or 3 years in the week we have been here. But that might be the area we are in? Will see how this holds up as we drive further out.

Things that have weirded me out

1. How polite the sales/ reception ppl are on the phone. The phone manner here is really different.  One person I rang today answered the phone saying ' This is Dotti, I can help you'. And she could and she did but the NZ in me made me think.  ..  'hold on Dotti, let me be the judge of that'....
 Another women at a bank thanked me a couple of times for asking when I replied 'Good thanks and you?' when she asked me how I was. The ma'am thing just  makes me feel old.

2. Really orange cheese.  So far the cheese has been the worst thing about living here. We are trying lots of types but T has stopped eating  it altogether.


Things we have done.

1. A couple of toddler gym times. One in particular was awesome and T had a ball

2. Met up with a group of mums in a meetup.com group who were super friendly

3. Been to the Texas State Aquarium complete with splashpad and dolphin show. T absolutely loved the splash pad.

4. Been to lots of shops and the mall here. H already has some new clothes and T some new toys.

5. Found a pretty cool playground  down the road from us after it was recommended to us. T had been asking every day to go to one, so took advantage of a couple of cooler mornings to go.

6. All come down with a nasty cold, sore throats etc. G and I taking turns to look after boys or rest. Hopefully it will be gone before long. Poor H is totally miserable tonight

7. G went to a friday night high school football game.  Such a massive thing here
8. Had stereotypes confirmed when a hairdresser asked if we drove to Texas from NZ. Not often am I rendered speechless...

Things im grateful for

1. Skype

2. The ten days before Garth starts work to explore and find everything.

3. Google.

4. Knowing a couple of people before we got here who have been invaluable for advice and recommendations.


American Flags seen: 47  Texas Flags: 5 Guns: 0

so far

these are my largely incoherent thoughts from last 48 hours


 1. Saying goodbye sucks - from now on I plan to avoid the word. Instead I will just quietly leave any function/town/country without warning


 2. Airnz nz is awesome, skycouches are worth the money without a doubt.


 3. The entire process at LAX is beyond ridiculous.  don't expect a red carpet welcome. There is no courting the tourist dollar here. Though one nice lady did let us cut the immigration line because of the babies.  Things were made worse when they told us that even though we were checked through to the next flight and all our gear was meant to be transferred, we were going to have to carry our mountain buggy pram onto the shuttle and across to the united terminal. So we did, Garth and I carried two babies (t would burst into tears if Garth put him down) 4 carry ons (nappy bags etc) and a pram in its carry bag across a road, onto a bus, off the bus, up an escalator,   through a large hall,dropping off the pram, through security - taking off shoes, belts, emptying pockets, both being drug swabbed, up another escalator, then another 200m before finally sitting and drinking water. Garth actually has bruises on his shoulder  this morning from the pram. No help or acknowledgement  or anything from staff during whole ordeal. I would have cried apart, but sweating had left me without moisture to spare. I start my American adventure 5kgs lighter thanks to that hour of my life.

4. United Airlines sucks. Flying the friendly skys my arse.

5. Our accommodation is better than expected.  Two bedroom, two bathroom condo with communal pool, gym,  beach volleyball pitch and outdoor kitchen. Pics to com. Happy

6. Its so hot glasses steam up when I get out of the car.

7. Grocery shopping done. Cant find decent cheese but organic supermarket here is pretty good and hey gluten free donuts.

8. Corpus christi seems pretty easy to navigate.  Might even try driving tomorrow.. or, you know, the day after that...

9. Am so tired I was slurring my words reading a story to t as I was falling asleep myself.


10. Writing a blog on a phone is hard. Excuse any and all mistakes including layput. Air fright arrives tomorrow with computer.

So goodnight to all
Xx

Monday:
Guns   0  American flags 7      Texas flags 2

saying goodbye is hard to do

So it finally arrived - the last week here in Taranaki.

I actually cant believe it is here. We found out Garth had the job in Texas when Harry was a week old - to put that in perspective, he is now 6 months old. It has been a long time (and yet a very fast time) coming.

We have sorted, cleaned, pruned, gardened, counted, thrown stuff away, painted, built, and organised so many things over this last 6 months. In fact, Garth and I would have put about 5 - 10 hours a week into this move each week since February. And being me, I have put lots of hours into laying awake at night going over every aspect in my head. Oh and writing those lists.

Tomorrow night we leave for Auckland. The boys and I will be setting up at Ma and Pa's for a month. We have family to farewell during our time there and have lots of fun things to do like the Zoo, MOTAT, Kelly Tarltons etc. Hubby is still around for a couple of weeks - cleaning the house, overseeing everything being packed and put into a container, more cleaning etc. for our tenants. Today I have started packing suitcases - a daunting task. Packing for three months. One month the tail end of winter and two months in a much hotter (like 25degrees hotter) climate. It will be weird to be reunited with our stuff at the end of November.

But the hardest part of this week .. the goodbyes.

Some goodbyes are easy - goodbye stupid rubbish collection system, goodbye to winters coughs and colds, high food prices, and a country without IKEA and with slow internet.Goodbye stupid 'windows help centre' scammers who seem to have us on direct dial, Goodbye to weekend chores and to do lists that come with being a home owner.  These things - I happily say good bye to.

but the rest... well not so much.

Goodbye to the beautiful mountain and sea views we enjoy in Taranaki. Nothing beats a crisp cold Taranaki winters morning. The mountain has come to represent  home in a way I never thought it would when we first moved here.

Goodbye to the lifestyle here in NZ, where hubby is home 10 minutes after finishing work, where doctors visits are free for the boys, where safety is just a fact of life, where the chocolate is awesome and the wine is even better. Goodbye to the kiwi depreciating sense of humour. I miss you already. 


But the goodbye Ive been avoiding is this one.

Goodbye to my 'mummy' friends - the women who I have been raising my boys alongside from the YPS to antenatal, and others collected along the way. You guys are just awesome. We have bumbled our way through this parenting thing together, learning on the job, talking every little and big issue over,  laughing, drinking ( just me?) and shaking our heads at it all.They say it takes a village to raise a child.....pfft... I firmly believe it takes a village to support a mum (and dad) in raising a child. You guys have been so much a part of our boys lives, directly in your interactions with them and indirectly through the support you have given hubby and I. Every offer of help over these two years, and especially the last six months, while not always utilized has been like a small gift.
I have found such true friends in you and it was so lovely to spend last Sunday morning with you  - just chatting and being people, not just mums. I have no way to articulate how much your support, love, and friendship has meant to me. ( mainly because if I think too much about how to say what I want to say.. well... lump in my throat material)
 So thank you all.

 

T- minus 19 days in New Plymouth

So we have 19 days left in New Plymouth before I head to Auckland for a month with the boys.

This means after months of slow progress things are about to speed up.

So where are we at? 

 We have finished getting our house 'renter ready' - on a side note - being a landlord is expensive and it takes a lot of work and maintenance to make a house 'low maintenance'. If it wasn't for generous offers of help from family and friends - this would have been near impossible with two babies and limited weekend time that Garth has, because lets face it - most of the jobs he has needed to do. 

Beginning to cut down the hedge. Had gotten a 'little' out of control

we weeded!

new fence in, bark added

Got the big guy on the job

My main job in the next week or so is to count everything we own and give its value for insurance purposes. Our move counselor ( I know, how American is that!) needs these forms complete in the next week

page 1 of about 7

 
And so now I'm counting. Counting socks, toys, towels, books, wine glasses, everything.
I'm even having to count our marble. Though that one was pretty easy.

In the last 24 hours I have worked out that 
- I can accommodate 102 of my closest friends popping over for a beverage simultaneously. 
- I have 41 ramekin, or small serving bowls - dip anyone? 
- I have 19 pillow cases for 5 pillows 
- I have 34 towels for 4 people. Meaning we could each use 8 towels a day and i would still have two spare.
- Horrifically ( and dont tell Garth) Theo has 53 (!) size two t shirts. In my defence though, there is a lot of variation across stores so some of these are the result of him growing out of size two at one place and into size two at another. 

Counting everything is slow going and giving it an approximate value has taken me hours. The hope is that no one will actually use these forms and our stuff will arrive intact. But if we did (Rena) I want them to be as accurate as can be.

The counting has provided for me the chance to sort through everything which has been needed. As part of the move Im not actually allowed to pack anything. The company that is shipping our stuff has to take responsibility that nothing will get broken and to take it through US customs (did you pack your own bag when you go through the airport, sort of thing) so they pack it all for us.
 It was a major relief finding out this arrangement as I don't think, with two babies, I would have had the time to actually pack anything especially towards the end with all the stuff I use daily. This arrangement means I walk out of the house with our suitcases and leave everything for someone else to worry about. 

The only downside of course is that when you pack you usually sort through all that extra stuff you have accumulated but never used - so as I have been going through everything and counting it, I have been sorting out stuff that I don't want to take and donating, giving or throwing away.


and how are we feeling?
Impatient I think - both of us are just wanting to get through the next few weeks and get all the little jobs that are left done.  To know that our tenants are happily settled in our house will be a huge relief. 

As for the goodbyes I will have to say in the next 20 days. I'm going with a head in the sand approach.

a list of lists

I'm a lover of lists.

As a teacher it was helpful, as a stay at home mum - it's a necessity. 
Not because I will forget to do things, but rather because it can be hard to feel like I have accomplished anything in  my day without one. I have a notebook of lists - and each day at breakfast I write out what I want to get done that day. It does not make for interesting reading I assure you. It includes things like making dinner, hanging the washing. But at the end of the day, I can look at it and know I did stuff - I got more done than just looking after the boys. I say 'just' loosely, anyone with small kids will know that some days that is a major accomplishment in itself. That said, a couple of times since Harry has been born, I have been able to look at my list at the end of the day and see all the things i DIDNT do that day. And yes every so often ( okay as often as I can) I like to leave my crossed off list in plain view so that hubby can see it hasn't just been a day of watching Ellen and eating the baking chocolate.

So with this whole Taranakitotexas thing, there have been plenty of lists. I even have a folder filled with lists. All clearly labelled. ( My love for my label maker is only secondary to my love of lists) 

Here is a list of the lists I have on the go at the moment.

Things that need to be finished around the house
Things that need to be sold/given away/ taken to the tip 
Things that need to go to mum and dads for storage 
Things to buy 
Things to be packed in suitcases
Things that will go via airfreight
Things going in the container 
A list of our contents for insurance - down to the number of socks we have and corresponding replacement price.

and so on. 

But this move has also seen other lists evolve.

Lists like 

Things I will miss about New Plymouth 
1. Friends
2. Pak n Save shop n go (seriously) 
3. Tracy - the lady who cuts Theo's hair - amazing woman - Theo is on about haircut 20 - no tears, no tantrums. Gives him a spray bottle of water and he spends the whole time 'shooting' everyone in the mirror.
4. Being able to find my way around. I have a terrible sense of direction. I've even gotten lost in Borders on Queen st. Having the mountain and the sea on either side of me at least gave me an idea of where I am in the town. 
5. Those amazing crisp winter mornings.
6. The coast lines here - fish and chips at the beach is a family favourite and even though we will be on the coast in Texas - it wont compare and the fish and chips wont exist! 


Things I will miss about NZ
1. Family - even just skyping in the same time zone.
2. Easily distinguishable money
3. u's (colour, favourite etc) 
4. Our food. Not the prices that's for sure, But the quality and freshness. 


Things I wont miss about NZ
1. Weta's.



and then there are these lists 

Places in the US I want to visit 
1. New York. In winter. At Christmas. This is my non negotiable.
2. Boston - US history
3. Washington DC - (side note: found out today that if we want to go on a tour of the white house and we do want, we have to apply to go on one through the New Zealand embassy. Even US citizens who want to go on the tour have to apply through their member of congress. Meanwhile in NZ I can probably found John Key's personal cell number through a Google search.)
4. New Orleans - food, culture
5. Las Vegas 


Experiences I want to have 

 1. Halloween - Already thinking about what i will be dressing the boys as for their first trick n treat. 
(Want to go for the cute factor in order to get more candy and yes i fully intend to eat the majority when they are asleep that night.)

2. Fourth of July - this will be interesting. My automatic reaction to American patriotism is to roll my eyes. Did you know you can even buy kids clothing that is fourth of July themed. Stars, stripes and eagles? - the whole deal.

3. Couponing. I want the free stuff even if it is shampoo for dandruff ( that I do not have)

4.Thanksgiving and corresponding black Friday sales. I want a crazy deal that i have to fight another lady for - true American trash styles.

5. The crazy - I want to see the crazy that is the mega stores - the crazy that is walmart - the crazy that are the sizes of everything.  Apparently everything is bigger in Texas - does that mean crazier?

6. Doomsday prep. Just a little. I want to visit a place that sells those crazy underground bunkers. Just to get a feel for it. 

7. Shoot a gun. Just once i think. Though saying that, I'm dead scared to pull the 'trigger' of nasal spray, but maybe that's because you are shooting yourself, so we will see how we go. Someone suggested we s just go to the border and shoot illegals.Texas mindset?

These lists are by no means final. They are a work in progress. 

So I'm curious. If you were me, what would your lists look like? Have I missed any must sees? or must dos?

the beginning

First an apology:
I was literally the worst English teacher on the planet. I doubt this blog will have any punctuation apart from the occasional . and every once in a while I might get fancy and use a ,. 
But I don't care.
If you do, don't read it.


The plan: 
To move our little family of four to Corpus Christi Texas
Why? 
Hubby has a new job working at an independent oil refinery


Yeah but why?
For a bit of adventure I guess. Our boys aren't in school and we have a couple of years before we have to make decisions around their education



So:
In the last four months these things have happened. ..

1. Hubby was offered a new job
2. We applied for and won a work permit in the lottery system (crazy system 42% chance)
3. Our visas were approved.
4. I resigned my job after three years maternity leave


and now?

Just this week the moving company came through our house and have estimated how much time etc it will take for them to pack the house. 
Turns out once you take out all the electrical stuff that wont work over there, we don't have much. Apart from a lot of wine glasses. 
It will take two days apparently with a third day to put it all on a truck.  There is no point me attempting to clean with the boys in the house. Theo, in particular, is a rock star, and by that I mean he is able to trash any room he enters in minutes. Turns out I'm not 'allowed' to do any packing anyway. Suits me perfectly. Garth will be left to do the cleaning as I will be with boys in Auckland. Perks of breastfeeding, i guess.


TIMELINE
Now - August:

- Getting the house tenant ready - weeding gardens, buying a pool cover, etc. 
- Dealing with all the admin etc that comes with an international move - photocopying important docs, international driving permit etc 



The to-do list at the moment is actually horrific. and spreads across about 5 pieces of paper. and has subsections. and has one thing crossed off and two things added almost every day.  

End of August:

I leave with boys to Auckland to stay at Ma and Pa's. Packing will be interesting as all we will have for the next three months is what I pack. Have to think about weather NZ vs TX, and the changing needs of the boys - Harry in particular.
Garth cleans house and vacates it to stay on someone's couch - his first flatting experience. 
We cancel phones, internet, power, gym memberships etc... Lots to do here.

September
Garth finishes at work, joins us in Auckland

September 21 
We leave from Auckland to LA. ( 12 hoursish)
One skycouch, one seat, one bassinet booked 

In LA we get on a flight to Houston ( about 3.5 hours). I expect this to be the worst flight of the three. No TVs, No on board meal except what you purchase, tired little family.

Stay the night in Houston as we miss the last flight to corpus christi 

September 22nd 
50 minute flight from Houston to Corpus Christi 
Here we have a furnished apartment for the first two months till we get settled. 

Then we have ten days before Garth starts work. Plan is to get phones, grocery shop, check the area out, I have to check out the mall ( for the kids- selfless mom award), buy a car or two etc.

October 1 
Garth starts work and then reality begins. 

I guess the purpose of this blog is as an online diary for friends and family to keep up with our travel. I don't really have a plan for frequency or content. It will just be what it is. So bear with me and hopefully I will be able to keep you up to date on our taranakitotexas adventure.